08.20.07
The Shot Smelled Around the Block
Last night I came back from a night at the bars with my roommate. As we walked up to our apartment, I swore I smelt something awful. Weird stenches are not that uncommon in a country with an overly dense population and somewhat lax sanitation standards.
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| I have seen some pretty foul happenings in 3 years in China, but none has hit home like this bomb dropped 10 feet from my doorstep last night. |
This morning when I left my apartment to go to record my TV show, my worst fears were confirmed. Some person had had a severe episode of la duzi just outside my door. The craziest part of it is that I live on the 4th floor, so whoever the culprit was had to climb up 4 flights of stairs before relieving themselves. With the way things work here in my apartment complex, the mess should get cleaned up some time this week. I’m still keeping my fingers crossed. This may be the sign that it’s truly time to leave China.
maxiewawa
said,
August 20, 2007 at 11:28 am
We’ll miss you!
ps gross….
Jet So
said,
August 20, 2007 at 11:35 am
In the previous past, a reply mentioned, “You’ll smell something in the US, and your mind will trigger sensations of China, …” Such memories of China wouldn’t be triggered by some drunken hangovers at the seedier roadhouses in Kansas!
Jeremy
said,
August 20, 2007 at 11:37 am
Yeah, Ben – that’s some nasty stuff. Probably was a kid, though. Kids can do the cutest things!
Benjamin Ross
said,
August 20, 2007 at 11:47 am
Jeremy-
That was my first reaction as well…but judging by the diameter…I think it was a little too big to be the work of a child.
susanfly
said,
August 20, 2007 at 5:05 pm
It’s really awfull! If u r in a village, there are more available, but they are produced by animals.
Xiao
said,
August 20, 2007 at 5:09 pm
That is truly foul. Although I’m betting that whoever had to la ta de du zi felt even worse before dumping his load. Hope you survived the day!
canrun
said,
August 20, 2007 at 5:28 pm
That’s one hell of a plop for a xiao harrr! Ben, the message is on the wall–er–floor. It’s time to go.
When the seven year old girl peed right on the floor in KFC last year in full view and no one said a word…I knew it was time to go. December, baby! December…
kmm
said,
August 20, 2007 at 6:01 pm
I dunno, the same thing happened in my apartment complex in Boston. Sometimes when people have to go, they have to go. I don’t think the filthiness of it necessarily has anything to do with China.
Don Allison
said,
August 20, 2007 at 8:31 pm
Ben: I would like to think that the little Bank Teller you ripped off a while back had a poetic justice thing going on when she did her squat.
James
said,
August 21, 2007 at 2:10 am
An irate viewer perhaps?
Law Office of Todd L. Platek
said,
August 21, 2007 at 3:34 am
Jet So, that was my comment. Well, it shows you how correct I was. Now, Ben has additional odors he can add to his list of fragrances which will remind him of this particular experience.
Law Office of Todd L. Platek
said,
August 21, 2007 at 3:39 am
By the way, I wasn’t originally referring to such unpleasant odors. In my case, it was 1977 and I was walking at Columbia University, past a large grouping of piney bushes, and the fragrance caused my flashback that I was climbing a mountain path in central Taiwan. It only lasted a second or two, but was so realistic that I never forgot it.
Alan
said,
August 21, 2007 at 7:27 am
Ben, I am so sorry you had to experience this shit (pun intended). Somehow I don’t think it was a random act. Many years ago at a college in Xiamen, the same thing happened, except that the perpetrator was a foreigner. He did that to make a statement (i.e., China stinks). In retaliation, Chinese students wrote two huge words (i.e., F??? U) where he could see from his dorm window.
“This reminds me of China.” My wife and I say this to each other all the time when we have to use a smelly outhouse during a camping trip. Hey, we are Chinese and we have the damn right to say that. Like what we also said, follow your nose while in China if you want to find a bathroom.
Yu
said,
August 21, 2007 at 7:29 am
That is totally gross.
Peter
said,
August 21, 2007 at 2:52 pm
Someone sure had too much chilli and raw shrimp…. That’s some real nasty doe you won there Ben.
It is not just a China thing. Ugly stuff happens in the west too. From what I have experienced in China, it is not to the same extend though.
canrun
said,
August 21, 2007 at 4:27 pm
“It is not just a China thing. Ugly stuff happens in the west too.”
Ain’t nobody shittin’ mate outside. At least not where I’m from. And I don’t mean the poodles in Paris!
Xiao
said,
August 21, 2007 at 4:49 pm
Well…you’d be surprised. I’ve been on trains where there are quiet little dumps in dark corners. I guess in western countries it all just gets cleaned up faster.
James Chiang
said,
August 21, 2007 at 5:43 pm
Ben
Isn’t your major anthropology? Except for the diameter of the shit, would you like to do any more reseach to find out what difference between Chinese and the other races?
Peter
said,
August 21, 2007 at 9:32 pm
Canrun: You’re right. Well, you’re right that it’s not normal here in Denmark and generally no one does these things because they are lazy, primitive or just don’t care. Sometimes someone needs to go NOW and they do bad stuff like shitting or puking where they don’t belong to. That’s what I have experienced here in Denmark and other parts of Europe anyway.
The difference between these folks and stuff like this one Ben observes is that some people do it when they have other and wiser options. Not because they have to go here and now. I have observed these things a lot in China. I’ve seen people squatting and doing their business outside a public toilet instead of going inside. Maybe the smell inside was extremely bad, but sure don’t help isolate it when you grow the area to include the sidewalk outside too. Plenty of times I have seen people leaving their “mark” other places too where they shouldn’t.
If it’s a culture thing, or lack of common decency I will leave to others to answer, because I simply don’t know. One thing I do know, however, is that I find this habit disgusting.
Hotpoter
said,
August 22, 2007 at 3:39 pm
wow, and you decided to share this crap with us by taking a picture of it, that’s pretty nasty.
Shopgirl's Shanghai Lifestyle blog
said,
August 23, 2007 at 2:11 am
What the heck????????
I am having a salad and this laptop in front of me!!!!!!!!!
>_
owshawng
said,
August 24, 2007 at 11:05 am
When you gotta go, you gotta go. From the splatter pattern, looks like it was an emergency evacuation. Perhaps someone ate some bad chinese, or maybe some nasty pizza? maybe one of your upper floor neghbors couldn’t make it upstairs in time.
Jet So
said,
September 3, 2007 at 4:22 pm
Law Office of Todd L. Platek: I have the same feeling whenever I return to Hong Kong and smell the “fragrance” from the harbour and sidestreets of Wanchai late nights.
Shopgirl: I hope the smell isn’t the same as the taste …
shame on you
said,
September 10, 2007 at 10:32 pm
well, i can show you some danish did the same on my stairs three days agao,do u want to look at the picture? e-mail me ,perhaps later i will also upload on my blog,hopfully that wont lead to some results.
i always see danes pee in the public ,sometimes i will view a good sight of men peeing with the back towards you wile women hiding the bushes,usually happened in park when there are some parties